


Cover you, smother you

by NaturalandReal (icyzephyr)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-21
Updated: 2012-04-21
Packaged: 2017-11-04 01:31:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/388160
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icyzephyr/pseuds/NaturalandReal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam has grown tired of Castiel avoiding him and he's jealous of the attention Dean receives. When he confronts Castiel he finds there's a lot more to it than that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cover you, smother you

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for someone for the The Great Blind Sassy Exchange that Sastielweek on tumblr put on. I hope this work is satisfactory.

“What does Dean have that I don’t?”

 Sam’s words shot across the room, eyes narrowed and burning into Castiel’s back as he stood rigid in the doorway of Bobby’s kitchen.

 Sam strode closer to the angel, towering over him, Cas’ face unreadable.

“You’re either running from me, hiding from me… or making sure someone is with us at the same time and when I try to talk to you, you just disappear and…“ Sam trails off, running a hand through his hair, taking a deep calming breath.

“I’ve done everything I can. I’ve saved as many people as I possibly can. I have done  _everything_ to try to do better, to  _be_  better. None of it will make up for what I am, what I’ve done but  _I’ve tried.”_

_Why can’t you save me too?_

But those words die on his tongue and shaky hands grab Castiel’s tie for fear the angel will run, as if his human hands can keep him there if he decides to vanish on him but Castiel only blinks, lowering his eyes to Sam’s hand and up again to search his face.

Sam shifts himself closer when Castiel attempts to back away, Sam can hear a faint buzzing noise and tugs Castiel back towards him. “Tell me, what does he have, Cas?” Hazel eyes boring into the angel, demanding an answer, the angel trying to get away but he only wraps the tie around his hand, shortening the distance.

Sam can see the heat crawling up Castiel’s neck and that buzzing noise becoming more persistant and when Castiel speaks his breath is caught in his throat.

“It’s not what Dean has, Sam. It’s what he doesn’t.”

“What?” Sam’s face is screwed up in confusion, blinking harshly at the buzzing sound that turning into slow humming, almost melodic.

Castiel draws himself up straighter, ignoring Sam’s possessive grasp on his tie. “I feel…  _odd_ around you Sam. I was unsure how to go about dealing with these feelings. So I have been avoiding you, yes. Only to work it out, and working it out took much longer than anticipated.”

Sam drops his arm, the weight of it tugging Castiel forward, losing his balance just for a moment but Sam keeps hold of the dark blue tie digging his nails into the fabric.

“Why?” Sam chokes out, a nervous sweat breaking out under his hairline, those blue eyes piercing him, disarming him as they always did and when he tries to move closer to him, his ears were assaulted by the melodic hum and Castiel attempting to slip back but Sam’s hand grasped Castiel’s left hips, holding him in place.

“Tell me, Cas.” He whispered with heavy breath and he could feel himself vibrating from head to toe, digging his fingers harder into Castiel’s hip in response.

Castiel stiffened and seemed to deflate, whatever courage he had found dripped away.  “I don’t understand the way this feels.” He motions up and down with his hands and Sam’s brows furrow.

“What, exactly?” Castiel was motioning to Sam but this was lost on him.

“Your size.”

Sam blinked, narrowing his eyes in confusion.

“I’m just tall and … “

“Big.” Castiel finishes his eyes swooping up and down Sam now and the vibration picks up in intensity and Sam is forced to back away, ears filled with that sweet sound and rubs at his temple.

“For fucks sake, what is that? Do you hear that, feel it?”

Castiel’s eyes widen in surprise. “That’s my grace, Sam.”  He inches toward Sam and grabs him by the arm, focusing only on him and the vibrations ease out of his body and the noise fades.

“I’m sorry, this is why I avoid you, Sam. I do not want to be in close proximity to you or I cannot control how I react, my very angelic essence feels as if it is exploding.”

Sam shakes his head, hazel eyes falling on Castiel’s hand on his and feels that rush of heat and acceptance, the touch of the angel he’s so longed to feel, that was not asked for.

“When you’re this close to me, I feel weird, Sam. I am an angel. In this vessel, I am confined. While it’s cozy and made just for me, I am used to being so much bigger than the physical world. And you, with your massive size… I feel small. I feel warm and… I want to be covered, Sam. By you.”

“Wha – “

Castiel has Sam pressed against the doorframe now, dragging his chapped lips across Sam's neck. Castiel’s hands are gripping Sam’s hips and wedging his leg between Sam’s. Shivering, that slow vibration spreads throughout Sam's body and this time he allows himself just to  _feel_ it.

He’s growing hotter and hotter with Castiel like this, he can feel the slow blue burn of Castiel’s grace now.

“But really,” Castiel says into Sam’s ear, “I just want to try and cover  _you._ I feel this urge Sam. To smother you, to show you my true size and power, don’t want to be limited by this flesh.”

Castiel runs his hands up and down Sam’s sides and the back of his head hits the doorframe, letting Castiel lick the hollow of his throat.

“This form is so limited. If I could, I would certainly wrap my true form around you.” Sam can barely focus at all with Castiel’s fingers rubbing hard circles just above his waistband.

Then suddenly all contact is broken and that sweet  _sweet_  burn is disappearing and Castiel looks at Sam, the hunger that had been in his eyes slowly working its way to calm blue again but Sam is still trying to breathe, his own eyes wide and wild.

“I apologize for this Sam. Maybe now you understand why I couldn’t be with you, the way I was with Dean. I do not love you any less. I always stopped short of touching you, of being next to you, because temptation is far too easy to give in to.”

He needs to feel that vibration and bright blue fill his body. He's had a taste and now he wants more and feels strangely empty without it and his hands are searching for Castiel, reaching out shakily, “But I want this,” his voice hits Castiel in a way Sam cannot be sure of until Castiel lets Sam wrap his hand around his wrist and pulls him back against his huge body and he could hear Castiel take in large deep breaths from the crook of his neck, their bodies slotted together against the doorframe and Castiel’s unpracticed hands were demanding and eager, kisses rushed and needy. Where Castiel kisses left a white pleasant burning sensation and Sam couldn’t help but croon and twist under the weight of the angel.

It’s what Sam had made him experience that drove Castiel away. He did have an angel or rather, the angel had him. He wasn’t lacking compared to his brother, he wasn’t so flawed that this celestial being wanted nothing to do with him.

These kisses and messy virgin fumbling displayed quite clearly and Sam wouldn’t take this back, not even when he was on his back and crying out and waking next to the naked angel and when he looked down he could see the bruises and scratches along his own skin.

The boy with the demon blood was claimed by an angel, saved by an angel – something he hadn’t expected but with those protective arms around his chest, that soothing hum and light tingling on his skin - he knew it was what he needed and he _was good enough._


End file.
